Letters from the Rosh Yeshiva Shlit"a

Shidduch, Bochur

בעזרת ה' יתברך-יום א' פרשת תרומה, כ"ח שבט, שנת תשע"ט

Dear…., Talmid in Yeshiva Tiferes Hatorah

You made the right decision by not joining your friends and going away for Shabbos to a place where there is no Minyan; this demonstrates that you have Yiras Shomayim. It astonishes me that Chassidishe Bochurim would do such a thing – go away for Shabbos to a place without a Minyan or a Mikve, it is a display of קלות ראש.

Remain strong with your good deeds; continue Davening Shachris, Mincha, Maariv with Minyan, and carry on with your daily shiurim. Learn some Chumash and Rashi with the Targum every day, and Chai Perakim Mishnayos; the עיקר is you should learn a lot of Gemara, because through doing so you will merit to be protected from all harm.

Don’t worry about your Shidduch; you will soon find your true Zivug. Recite the קרבנות הנשיאים every day, as the Rebbe says (Sefer Hamiddos, Ois Chutan): “Whoever wants to find his Zivug, should say the קרבנות הנשיאים”. Say the following Tefilla that Maharosh wrote specifically for Bochurim and girls to merit to find their Shidduch, originally from the Sefer ‘Your Shidduch will arrive’.

“Reboinoi Shel Oilom, help me merit to find a good Shidduch, I should be Zoche to get married already, and not have to wait any longer for my Shidduch to arrive.

Hashem, I know there are times when I did not behave as I was supposed to, and I wasn’t always so righteous and Ehrlich. However, I beg you Hashem, disregard my Aveiros and don’t withhold my Shidduch because of them. Forgive me for everything I have done, and save me from any more sins by granting me my Shidduch I should be able to be Ehrlich.

What should I do? Reboinoi Shel Oilam, I am ready to get married tonight! What can I do that I haven’t found the right one yet? I’m waiting and waiting, and Davening for so long now, but nothing has yet come to fruition.

Chazal say that when one gets married after the age of twenty, he is doomed to think of Aveiros all his life, and you say regarding such a person that his bones shall disintegrate. Hashem! Why must I receive such a harsh punishment, that for the rest of my life I should have unholy thoughts, and my bones will disintegrate? Why am I at fault? Why do I deserve this? Is the terrible pain that I haven’t found my Shidduch yet, not enough?

Hashem, help me I should continue having patience, and not despair until my Shidduch arrives. Help me not question your ways, and I should strongly believe that everything you do is לטובה, and everything that happens on this world is accounted for.

Hashem, you are the only one who can truly understand what I am going through! Only you can feel the humiliation and embarrassment I suffer, that all my friends are married already and I remain all alone. Help me, that the shame should be a Kaparah for my Aveiros, and I shouldn’t have to go through this anymore, I should be Zoche to get married very soon.

I genuinely believe Hashem that you will not forsake me, and I will eventually merit to get married. Therefore, I beg you, when I do get married there should only be harmony and happiness in my home; we should never argue or fight Chas Vesholom, and there should only be אהבה אחוה שלום ורעות between us. We should love each other, and merit a happy marriage; we should never need to divorce Chas Vesholom.

Hashem, help me I should always be a ותרן, I should be able to concede and not argue over pettiness. Help me that I always be able to assist and support my wife. Help us establish a happy home together, there should always be a pleasant atmosphere in our home. I should merit healthy and Ehrliche children, and be able to raise them and see Nachas from them. My home should be a place of Chesed, I should merit to invite guests and give Tzedakah to the needy.

Hashem, please accept my Tefilla and help me already in the Zchus of all the Tzaddikim, and especially in the Zchus of Rebeinu Eliezer Shlomo Ben Menachem Zev, זכותו יגן עלינו, who made this Tefilla, אמן כן יהי רצון.”

May Hashem help you succeed in all your endeavors.

Simcha, Bochur

בעזרת ה' יתברך-יום ג' פרשת תרומה, א' דר"ח אדר א', שנת תשע"ט

Dear… Talmid of Yeshiva Tiferes Hatorah.

I received your letter.

Try with all the strength you possess to be happy, for the key to a successful person is positivity. The Rebbe states (Sefer Hamiddos, Ois Simcha): “Whoever is always happy, leads a successful life.”

Especially now that you have reached the stage of Shidduchim, you certainly must work to be happy, and always greet people with a smile. The first thing one wants to know by a Shidduch is, if the Bachur or girl is healthy, and they don’t suffer from mental illness. This information is readily available on someone’s face; if someone is always relaxed and has a smile on their face then it is an indication they are a healthy person, but if someone is constantly upset, and walks around with a frown, it could be a sign that there is something going on in his mind, for ex. anxiety etc. Hashem Yishmereinu. The Rebbe states (Likutei Maharan, Chelek 1, Siman 23): “When a person is depressed and there is a cloud of gloom hanging over his head, it is a sign that the סטרא אחרא have triumphed over him; they make sure his face shows signs of hopelessness and misery, and on such a person the Pasuk in Shemos (20, 2): "לא יהיה לך אל-הים אחרים על פני" is applied.”

Thus, I request from you to always be happy; if you try with all your might you will succeed to escape from your misery and depression and find a Shidduch; no one is interested to marry a Bachur who is miserable, girls want a happy boy.

Don’t waste your time; utilize your years to learn Torah. Learn the holy Gemara, Daf after Daf, even if you can’t comprehend what you are learning, say the words even without understanding. The Rebbe gave us the gift of the Seder Derech Halimud (Sichas Haran 76); take no notice of those who ridicule it, because one day we will see who the laughingstock is. Give it a few years and you will have learned hundreds of pages of Gemara, and those who scorned and joked about it will not have even opened their Gemaras.

May Hashem bless you with success in everything you do.


בעזרת ה' יתברך- יום ד' פ' יתרו, י"ז שבט, יומא דהילולא של מוהרא"ש זצוק"ל, שנת תשע"ט

To my dear…..

Thank you for your donation for the rent; in the merit of Tzedakah may Hashem bless you with success.

When you would be aware how happy I am every time you come to Yeshiva, and learn some Torah, you would certainly come over more often.

Believe me, your pain weighs heavily on my heart; I know how hard it is for you that you haven’t found your Basherte yet. I Daven to Hashem every day that you should find your Shidduch soon, and that you should remain steadfast, until that moment occurs.

I understand you don’t feel comfortable sitting in Yeshiva with boys a few years younger than you; especially since most Bochurim your age have gotten married already, but it means a lot to me every time you come up to hear some Chizuk.

I beg you…, don’t despair; you will soon merit to find your Shidduch.

Shidduch, Bochur

בעזרת ה' יתברך-יום ד' פ' בשלח, י' שבט, שנת תשע"ט


Reinforce your Emunah, Hashem is with you; even if the girl didn’t want to continue with the Shidduch, don’t despair; continue learning the holy Torah, and carry on your life with positivity, and you will Iy”h soon find your Zivug.

After the holy Rebbe’s wife passed away, the Rebbe was in Radville, and many women came to him, with the desire to marry him. The Rebbe then said (Chai Maharan 595) All of them are my Shidduchim, and every person has a certain amount of Shidduchim; every Shidduch that is suggested, is part of his ultimate Shidduch, even if it does not eventually happen. In the Rebbe’s own words “sometimes one travels to complete a Shidduch, and the two parties meet, and it seems like the Shidduch will happen already, and in the end, it falls apart. One must then remember that it was essential for this to happen, because this brings a person a step closer to his true Zivug.

I ask you: return to Yeshiva and continue learning your daily Shiurim; in this merit Hashem will help you find your true Shidduch.

Mishnayos, Seder Derech Halimud, Bochur

בעזרת ה' יתברך-יום ד' פ' בשלח, י' שבט, שנת תשע"ט


I received your letter.

Stay strong with all your might and continue serving Hashem; it brings me great pleasure to hear you are completing  Mishnayos for the second time, and you are מעביר סדרה every day.

Take no notice of the לצים who ridicule the Seder Derech Halimud; remember what Shlomo Hamelech said (Mishlei 31, 25): "עז והדר לבושה, ותשחק ליום אחרון"; and Chazal say, regarding this Pasuk (Shemos Raba 53, 2): "אימתי התורה משחקת לאדם?" When does the Torah show its beauty to the person? When does one reap the fruits of his labor?  "הוי ליום אחרון", on his last day; Hashem then unveils all the Torah the person learned during his lifetime; all the Pesukim of Chumash; all the Perakim Mishnayos; the Dafim Gemara; we will then see the validity of the Seder Derech Halimud, and the greatness of whoever followed it with תמימות ופשיטות.

When one mocks the Rebbe’s Seder Derech Halimud, he scorns it, and claims it isn’t considered learning; the Pasuk in Rus "אני מלאה הלכתי, וריקם השיבני" is applied to such a person. The Zohar explains (Zohar Chadash, Rus): His Neshumah cries "אני מלאה הלכתי", I came down to the world full of Torah, but: "וריקם השיבני", I am returning barren. However, one who learns with the method of the Seder Derech Halimud, returns his Neshumah overflowing with Torah.

Regarding your question if one may listen to music while learning Mishnayos; if this helps you learn Mishnayos better then it is ok.

Regarding etc.; remember the expression: “Look at me but don’t touch me,” if your……. has issues etc. stay far away from him.

You write that on numerous occasions you came up to me, and I didn’t answer the door; please understand, there are times when I am busy and it is simply not possible to answer. However, there is another door, and every time you knock, it is answered. Approach Hashem for everything you need; Chazal cite (Megilah 12:): Mordechai Hatzaddik had several names, "בן יאיר"- he illuminated the Yidden’s Life with his Tefillos; "בן שמעי"- He beseeched Hashem, and his Tefillos were answered; "בן קיש"- 'קיש' is an expression of knocking, "שהקיש על שערי רחמים ונפתחו לו", he knocked on the heavenly doors, Hashem should remove the evil decree – and he was answered.

May Hashem help you succeed in everything you do.

Hischazkus, Yiras Shomayim, Shidduch, Nachas, Bochur


בעזרת ה' יתברך-יום ה' פ' שמות, י"ט טבת, שנת תשעט


The chasunah which took place in yeshiva this week brings me great pleasure.

When we opened our cheder in Williamsburg for the first time; Maharosh z”l regaled that years ago, the person which headed the Breslev shul in Williamsburg was lamenting how hard his job was, and that there are times when he barely  has minyan. While standing on the street in conversation, a school bus passed by, and Maharosh turned to him and said, “give it some time, and buses with ‘Talmud Torah Breslev’ emblazoned on their side will encircle Williamsburg.” The latter replied “you‘re most certainly dreaming; there will never be such a thing”. Maharosh then smiled and said “Baruch Hashem that my dream has become a reality.” Maharosh then requested that we drive past his house, so he can show his rebbetzin the beautiful Mosdos we founded, which follows the teachings of the holy Rebbe.

During the chasunah I thought to myself: ‘one can truly see how Maharoshs vision became a reality;’ Maharosh wrote an endless number of letters on this subject, (see קונטרס לב אבות על בנים; ארך אפים אות ד', ועוד) that one should not waste time and money on expensive simchas, only to celebrate them simply.

On many occasions, Maharosh would ask the bochurim in Yeshiva: “what does a bachur really need? Only one thing, to find their shidduch.” Maharosh would say, all that is necessary is a minyan, and a tallis for the chuppah, and that is it! A bachur’s wish is to be able to quote the בת קיסר who said to the בן מלך after years of yearning for her shidduch (סוף סיפורי מעשיות מעשה ב', ממלך וקיסר) “and now בן מלך we have each other, it is time to go home.” Thanks to Hashem the unimaginable is now coming to fruition.

Someone came over to me during the chasunah and remarked “there is nothing lacking from this simcha, it is so beautiful, but one thing is missing; Maharosh should be sitting here with his famous smile, and be witness, that his hard work was not for naught.” I replied “Maharosh is here! where else would he be?” there, where one learns and reviews the lessons of a tzaddik, and conducts themselves according to his teachings, that is where the tzaddiks neshoma is. The holy Zohar brings (parshas acherei, daf 71:): “A tzaddiks presence is stronger once he has left the world, even more then when he was still alive”.

Tonight, there will iyh be a shiur; don’t make excuses why not to come, even though you think it’s the same old stuff as every week. When the yetzer hora tries too dissuade you with the argument “what is the point? You hear the same דיבורים week after week,” answer him: “and what is your chiddush? The same aveiros again and again……”

True, we will review the same thing as every week; I daven to Hashem that he should help me find a way into everyone’s hearts, and I should repeat only what Maharosh taught us all these years. First and foremost, Emunah; the seder derech halimud – the Rebbes directive of learning and התחדשות, starting anew. The importance of sholom bayis; the chinuch of our sons and daughters; and how careful one must be with his behavior at home, because despite their young age, children absorb and understand everything that occurs.

Use extra caution with your conduct at home, if one wishes to merit nachas, he must behave himself with yiras shomayim. A child which sees that his father is a sample of yiras shomayim, he prepares negel vasser before bedtime; he recites krias shema; he doesn’t raise his voice, or use coarse language, then he too will be ehrlich. The child will then imitate his parents, and also read krias shema and prepare negel vasser; and use only refined speech.

Daven to Hashem, that you should merit to always stay young and energized, despite your age.

Have a good day.